Thursday, March 1, 2012

Prince Of Persia. The One And Only

"Colin, no! Stop, don't do that".

"Hm, dad again, he'll calm down, let me pretend I didn't hear him."

"Colin David, I told you to stop, right?"

"Oops, he's using my biblical name, I'd better not go any further".

"Look what you've done here! You took out all the DVD's from the cupboard. Let's put them back together. Take that out of your mouth, it's not edible. Let me see, what did you bite here? Oh, Prince of Persia. The last version. I bought it before Christmas"

"Gee, this was 3.99, cheaper than a kebab"

"It's funny, this is cheaper than a kebab nowadays. You know, I played the first version of this game when I was a student ..."

"Oh, no, please, not another story from the war! Please please please! I promise I'll let you change my nappies without sticking my hand into my mouth right after checking the warmth of my poop!"

"... It's an incredible game, it fits on a diskette, 1.44 Mb. Back then the computers had only four megabytes of RAM"

"Four megabytes my nappies, you're such a story teller, dad! My plastic spoons have more than 4 Mb now!"

"This one, however, does not excite me that much, it's not quite realistic. There's this guy who can walk on the walls and fight all the bad men who try to capture him and so on, but there's something missing. And you need all your fingers and toes to play it. Back in those days, though, ..."

"OMG, it's gonna be a long childhood. Why can't I just go on gnawing the disc, as I was happily doing in the first place?"

"... You see, that was our life back then"

"Oops, I have a very strong feeling that I've missed a great deal of the conversation."

"But the game was awesome. We couldn't escape its thrall, we wasted a few good nights, we flunked an exam or two, but it was worth every single penny. Not that we paid for it, of course, but still. First of all, you had to complete it in one hour. No way! And there was no internet to search for cracking codes, but I found my ways around.

Some levels were completely crazy, it took me some valuable time to learn how to jump decently and avoid landing like a half-raw pancake right into some swords. And die of course"

"Wish I could speak properly so I could go on crying and sobbing that my dad died. He'll be busy consoling me, explaining to me that that happened in the game only, no more story, everyone happy. Alas, still have to wait a year or two". 

" ... And fighting was fun. Regular enemies were easy targets, but once or twice you had to face a fat bastard, who was far more skilled than the rest. Got past it after a few attempts. Then it was the green potion. The first one that I drank allowed me to float smoothly in the air, so I could jump  from the highest floor with no damage. When I encountered the second one and rushed to drink it, the whole game turned upside down. I had to close it, as I genuinely thought that I got a virus!

But nothing compared to Level 8. I thought that that was the end of the game, as I got to a point there was no way to advance further. However, there was something missing: I didn't find the girl. I found the secret 2 days later. I had to wait still for a few seconds. Then a rat came that pressed the slab that opened the gate that freed the prince who killed the guards who guarded the girl who lived in the house that her father built!
Maybe I can show it to you actually. Let's go to the computer and try to find it somewhere".

I like it very much when it comes to playing on a computer. The best part is when I get to chew on the mouse and my dad tells me that's not for eating. I think they just made that up cause there's only one mouse and they need it. Besides, it tastes like my pot food. However, after some DOS emulation and stuff, my dad managed to show me the game. I liked it in an instant and suddenly I understood my dad's passion for it. And indeed, the game was simple but very dynamic, the two dimensional animation was such made that it created a 3D feeling, the moves could be easily controlled with just a few keys, the horizontal or vertical scroll of the screens didn't give you headaches, in short - it worked like a charm.

There was something that puzzled me still. The game is called Prince of Persia, right? Persia was somewhere in the middle east, where Iran is nowadays. Why was the prince blond then?


  1. Thanks a lot, Huub! Colin is very funny, I only put on paper what he said to me :))